Holding Katie

In the hospital, when I was handed my daughter, I was incredibly tired. I was full of adrenalin and I was very concerned about the large amounts of blood continuing to pour out of my wife; I’d be lying if I said that I felt a joyous epiphany at that moment.

Days later and things have changed, there is something indescribable about holding your baby girl as she sleeps in your arms or, even more endearing, looks up at you with her big blue eyes. Katie is so vulnerable and trusting, she can sleep in positions that look amazingly uncomfortable. Sometimes, at the slightest disturbance, she will wake and strenuously demand to be fed. Other times, she seems to sleep through anything. As well as the joy and (surprising to me) calming influence holding Katie causes, in the background there is the knowledge that her existence charges me (and Em!) with a huge responsibility – but it’s a challenge that I’m looking forward to.

I’m sure that there will be tough times ahead but for the moment, while I’m spending my paternity leave with my nuclear family, everything is great in the world.